Feeling Low...

Just been on Look North and you may have seen i aint looking too well at the moment. I think the hardest part is that it has been 4 weeks since i came into hospital and i am at my worst now. I didn't feel this ill with the TBI and chemo, which i am finding very annoying. I saw Dr Cook this afternoon and he feels that the sickness is down to a reflux problem. My tummy is basically full of acid so everytime i move that is why i am sick. My swab results showed that i have a cold so at least it aint flu but it feels like it is. The body ache is because my magnesium and potassium are low so just having some through my line now. The CMV virus has come back negative so hopefully my counts will flourish. My white count has doubled from 0.21 to 0.45 and my neuts have gone from 0.09 to 0.21 since yesterday which is great. My platelets are 121 so i don't need any transfusions or injections to help my counts come up. Dr Cook is happy with how i am doing and is confident the sickness will be sorted in a couple of days. I think that everything is suddenly getting to me because i left the room the other day and it is christmas next week. I am starting to feel suffocated in my four walls and i am so restless on a night time when Tom has gone. I don't know how i would have got through this without him, the things he as done for me is unbelievable. I feel so empty when he goes and scared about how i will manage to do things. I would be really happy if my counts are normal on christmas day, that would be the best prezzie.