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Had a ok week...

Well i am c.diff and cmv free woo hoo! I still feel sickly most of the time but havent been sick for over a week now which must be a good thing hey. I am still finding eating a bit of a chore at the moment unless it is monster munch or quavers or haribo lol. I hope my dietician cant read this hah. I really really want a chinese but all the places near the hospital are only 1 star establishments so if anyone knows of a 5 star chinese takeaway in Leeds please let me know. It is a new rule that patients can only eat from 5 star take aways and dominos is the only one that the ward can use. This is better than none but there is only so many you can manage. I am nearing day 80 i believe so that will mean 20 days til day 100 when i can celebrate with bottled water and a trip to the supermarket lol. I asked Doctor Cook about why i am on penicillin (antibiotic) for rest of my life. The reason is that my spleen may have got irradiated during the transplant and so they have to treat me the same as someone without a spleen. A bit of exciting info for you there lol, i am full of facts when it comes to me and my care.


I would like to congratulate Tom and friends on Prohibit winning in Dubai it was an amazing day but wish Tom had been there. Lets hope Prohibit gets invited to world cup day so that Tom can make a trip to Dubai then as he deserves it. It was an amazing win and about time something good happened.

Had a very bad week!...

I came back into hospital with sickness and i now have a hospital bug and the cmv is back. The bug i have contracted is highly contagious and is not very pleasant. It is called clostridium difficile and you have to stay in isolation until it goes so that the whole ward doesn't get it. The cmv has come back quite high so i started treatment for that last night. I saw a pyschologist today because the doctors are worried about me as i have become very quiet and withdrawn this week and usually i crack a few jokes and i am sarcastic. I have literally done nothing since been readmitted as i have lost interest in everything so i just stare at the walls all day and look forward to sleeping as it is the only time i can escape my 4 walls. I am trying to be a bit more upbeat but it is very hard at the moment. Sorry i didnt have any happy news to post, hopefully i will soon.

Sorry i have not posted for a while...

As some of you will have seen on Look North this week i was finally let home after 9 weeks in hospital. It all happened so quickly on the tuesday evening. One minute i am hooked up to a drip stand having a magnesium transfusion the next i am preparing for Look North to arrive to film me leaving hospital. The CMV result had come back negative which meant they could finally send me home. I looked absolutely terrified but i promise i was excited too lol. When i did i get out that night i just slept as i'd had an exhausting day. My happiness of finally been let loose though was short lived. It started with me throwing up all day on Wednesday which meant i could not keep my tablets down. On Thusday i decided to ring the ward and they said i needed to come straight in. Thankfully there was a bed available(i will have been in every room on the ward by the end of it lol). The doctors are not sure why i am been sick but have put me on drugs to try and stop it. I haven't been sick since friday so i feel a bit better but i am still finding it hard taking tablets and eating cos my tummy is so sore. I didn't have a good night last night cos i spiked a temperature which means i am now on antibiotics and i am now in isolation til they get test results back to see if i have a tummy bug. It is a lot to take on when i should be at home getting back in to a routine again. Also the cmv is 1,000 so if it goes above 5,000 they will start treatment for that again. I have had a unlucky week and i am getting fed up of hospital now but the nurses keep me going with their sense of humour. I will hopefully have a happy feel good post one day lol.

Isolation...

What a week i have now gone from going home- to day release- to ISOLATION. I was only saying to Dr Cook yesterday that coping with isolation was not a prob for me cos at the time i was really ill but i said that i did not know how i would cope if i was in isolation now. I have been put in isolation to protect me whilst my neutraphils are low so i dont know how long it is for or owt cos still waiting to see the doctor. It is very hard not been able to wander in and out of my room as i please i gotta say mainly because i cant be nosey at what the nurses are up to lol. I am hoping it is just a temporay inconvineance to my weekend as i don't want my mood to worsten etc. I have got rid of facebook for the moment as i feel spending lots of time on a computer is not something i want to do anymore. I want to do more exciting things with my time now that i have a new life. I will be starting volunteer work as soon as i can mingle with people again lol. I have lost my identity the last couple of years but i will gradually get it back this year i hope! : )

Turned 21 since i last posted on here...

Had problems getting online for one reason and another so this is my first post in a while. Not that much to catch up on really apart from my b day at the weekend which didnt feel like a b day in my hospital room lol. I had hoped i wouldnt be sick but my tummy obv didnt care it was my b day so the day begun like all the rest. I have not been very well to be honest this week as i keep been sick and my stomach feels like someone has punched me in it and the pain doesnt go away. I had an ensoscopy this morning which just showed what we already knew but it didnt show anything worst at least. I was told i was going to be going home tomorrow...but then my cmv result came back as 1,000 so i begin treatment for that in the morning. I have been let out for the night tonight though so i am going to make the most of it as i will have been in hospital 2 months tomorrow which seems like forever. Thank you everyone for the birthday wishes and i will try and post on here as much as i can when the internet has been sorted in my internet room.

Not going home...

Well i thought yesterday was bad but today was a lot worst. My liver function test was higher than usual yesterday so they didn't want to send me home until they got it sorted but i was allowed overnight leave. I perked up a bit and loved sleeping in a normal bed again and not waking up to a nurse taking my bloods and doing my blood pressure. I didn't make it til midnight last night but Tom keeps saying we were awake but i am not counting it as i was in bed trying to sleep lol. We got to hospital this morning for my bloods checking and then i was looking forward to returning home until tomorrow. Bam it all went wrong when i asked if my CMV result was  back. It had gone up from 1,000 to 14,000 so i start iv treatment again  tonight which is twice a day and as you may have guessed i now have to stay over night whilst i am on it. I was very stressed about staying over night because i find it very difficult to sleep in hospital but they are giving me some zopiclone thankfully so i am in a better mood now. I know i have done well really to get to where i am and the cmv happens to most transaplant patients so i am not alone. I think it jsut takes its toll on you mentally when your told your going home and then your back on iv drugs again. I would rather this hapen now though ,rather than have got discharged and then have to be readmitted etc. I cant complain too much though cos i am very lucky to be out of isolation and able to go home for the day etc.

Going home tomorrow...all been well

After another pucky start to the morning yesterday i perked up a for a little bit. Tom cooked a nice roast for lunch which i really enjoyed. I was getting fed up of living off sandwiches lol. When we got back to hospital in the evening i was in agony with my stomach...maybe it was Tom's cooking hah only joking babes. I couldnt take my meds and had to go straight to bed. I slept badly for the third night in a row as i am having withdrawl symptoms from my sleeping tablets. I will just have to put up with it until my body gets back in to a natural sleep pattern again. I wasn't sick this morning so that was a good start to the day, and Dr Cook was his lovely self when he came to see me. He said i have done really well and that i will be getting kicked out in the morning. I will go home on oral treatment for the cmv and will return to the ward monday for my cmv levels checking. I will then go to clinic on the wednesday for my bloods doing. Dr Cook reminded me that i am no longer under Dr Smith's care which is the only bad news of the day lol. Unless the CMV level is really high tonight then i will be out at some point tomorrow. I just want to add how amazing Tom has been these last 6 weeks, he hasn't seen any of his family over christmas and has spent a fortune to be at the hospital night and day with me so Tom we will spend next xmas with your family and i will look after you as much as i can next year, love me x x

Has had a relaxing day at the mint hotel with Tom...

Thanks to the growth stimulation injection i had yesterday my neuts were above 8 this morning (they had dropped to 1.5 yesterday) so that meant i could be released for the day again. It was snowing at the hospital so Tom asked the nurses if he could take me to the hotel in Leeds so that if the weather got worst we wouldn't be far away. They said no problem as long as i stayed away from people and wrapped up warm. I have spent most of the day in bed as i forgot how comfy they are compared to the hospital ones and tbh my body needed a good rest after having a busy weekend. I have had a lovely tea which has given me maybe just enough energy to get a bath before heading back to my overnight accomadation. I think we may come back here again tomorrow if the weathers the same cos it is a 5 min drive from hospital and the room has 2 tvs which is more than i have at home lol. Before i forget the CMV is still positive so will continue with day release until i get a negative (i hope on thursday) and you never know they might get rid of me on new years eve. I dont think i will stay up til midnight so i aint bothered where i am or what  i am doing as long as i am snuggled up with Tom and got some good music on : )

has had a merry little xmas afterall...

I had a wonderful day yesterday as i was allowed home for a few hours after my xmas dinner. I was like a big kid on xmas eve getting over excited which did not please Tom lol. I recieved a phone call from my favourtie comedian Bill Bailey on xmas eve so whoever sent him the letter about me thank you so much for making my xmas so special. We talked about allsorts of stuff for about 10 minutes and the nurses couldn't believe it was really him lol. Thank you Bill for putting a huge smile on my face. I woke up at 4am on xmas day but managed to go back to sleep til 7 and was greeted by a grumpy Tom cos he had a headache and a cold sore, boo hoo! I slowly opened my presents and did half then and the other half a bit later on. I got loads of nice stuff and i deffo dont need any socks or slipper socks for my birthday lol. The xmas dinner was a disappointment i have to be honest, and my body would agree with that staement. I have had a lovely homemade dinner today though so that has made up for it. I absolutly loved having my bath today i could have stayed in for hours if my skin wasn't so sensitive to the heat which cut my bathtime short. I have borrowed a coat off my nan as Tom's coat made me look like paddington bear lol. I will be heading back to the ward shortly but as long as my neuts are ok again tomorrow, i can cope with bedtimes been at hospital for now.